Maudie's Meanders

  Hi, I'm Maudie, an almost 4yo German Shepherd dog. It gets a bit (bit? That was just a love nip) warm up here in the Dry Tropics, so my housemates keep the aircon on quite a bit (bit? I was nibbling) to keep me cool. Ah, those housemates. There are two humans and a couple of cockatiels. My great grandmother, Yannie, used to live with them, but she crossed the Rainbow Bridge last year. They were very sad. They hope to meet her again, because Psalm 36 says that God saves both people and animals. That will be lovely for me, too, because I never met her. The humans hadn't intended to invite another furry housemate for many months, but the lady who was midwife to both my great grandmother and me thought that we would get on well. Which we do. One of the humans is learning how to cook. The other one is already an excellent cook. The one who is learning is quite a bit (bit? Now you're imagining things) older than the one who can already cook, so I wonder why he hasn't learne...

  2 tbsp olive oil 1kg lamb leg steak 2 onions, halved and sliced 5 garlic cloves, crushed thumb-sized piece ginger, peeled and grated or finely chopped 1 tbsp ground cumin 1 tbsp ground coriander 1 tsp ground cinnamon pinch saffron ½ large preserved lemon, skin only, finely chopped 1 tbsp tomato purée 600ml hot beef stock or lamb stock 1 tbsp honey 1 lemon, zested, plus a squeeze of juice 80g pitted Kalamata olives handful chopped mint, coriander or parsley (or a combination) couscous or rice, to serve STEP 1 Set the slow cooker to low. Heat 1 tbsp oil in a pan and brown the lamb in batches, transferring to the slow cooker as you go. Add the remaining oil and the onions to the pan and cook for 8-10 mins until softened. Tip in the garlic and ginger and stir for 1-2 mins, then add the spices, preserved lemon and tomato purée. Warm through, then tip into the slow cooker. Swirl some water around the pan, then pour into the slow cooker along with...

Apart from cheese, there's nothing for a doggie to steal while the hooman cooks this. Onions are very bad for canine creatures. Meanwhile, the hooman can sip his supposed cooking wine and brandy to his heart's content. Boo! French Onion Soup Prep time 20 mins Cook time 60 mins Total time 80 mins Servings 4 to 6 servings Ingredients 6 large brown onions 4 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil 2 tablespoons butter 1 teaspoon sugar Sea salt 2 cloves garlic, minced 2L beef stock, chicken stock, or a combination of the two (The hooman uses Maggie Beer because he says it's the best) 125ml dry white wine or dry vermouth 2 bay leaves ½ teaspoon dried thyme ½ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper 2 tablespoons red vermouth or brandy 8 slices (2½ cm thick) French bread or baguette 1½ cups grated Gruyere cheese Sprinkling grated Parmesan cheese Method Peel and thinly slice the onions from root to stem. There should be about 10 cups of sliced ...

  Easy Pork and Sauerkraut Prep 15 m Serves 4 Prep 15 m Cook 6 h Ready In 6 h 15 m Ingredients 500gr boneless pork chop, cut into 3 ish cm  cubes 2 x 500gr jar sauerkraut with juice bottle Coopers Vintage Ale (or substitute. Not that there is one 🍺) Granny Smith apple, peeled and cored 1 tablespoon minced garlic 1/2 tablespoon fresh dill 1 teaspoon onion salt 1 teaspoon mustard powder Directions Combine all ingredients in a slow cooker and stir well. Submerse the apple under the other ingredients. Cook on High for one hour, reduce heat to Low and continue cooking for 5 hours or until pork is cooked through. Discard apple. Serve with mashed potato and apple sauce.

Roast beef, perfect, and every accompaniment is cheating. For 4 Nibbles  Sherry (because we had just got home from church, and we are Anglicans after all. If you prick us.) 1.4kg ish topside. Roll all sides in olive oil (Never mind measures, just dollop), rosemary, thyme, garlic, mustard powder, salt and pepper.  Birds Eye frozen roast veg Aunt Betty's Frozen Yorkshire Puddings, pack of 12, I used 4. Birds Eye Frozen Garden Peas. Big dollop in a bowl. Lump of butter. Maggie Beer Australian red wine finishing sauce x 2. A South Australia cab shiraz. A Marlborough Pinot Noir. Eton Mess for dessert (thankyou Leisa 😘 ) For four humans, and the odd beef handout to a GSD. _____________________________________________ Take the beef out of the fridge half an hour or so before you want to start cooking it. Rinse bloody stuff off, dry in tea towel. Recipes say pat dry with kitchen paper towel. Nonsense, unless you want bits of kitchen roll stuck to yr beef. Pre heat air fryer @ 200C fo...

  3 cups self-raising flour 1/3 cup white sugar         1 tsp garlic powder or          1 tsp salt         1 Tbsp baking powder         1/3 cup shredded parmesan or vintage (ie strong) cheddar or gruyère         355 ish ml can or bottle beer (Metric cups) Directions Preheat oven to 175 degrees C. Line a 9" x 5" (in old money) loaf pan with baking paper. Mix flour, sugar, salt, garlic, baking powder, & shredded cheese together in a large bowl. Pour in beer and continue to mix, first with a wooden spoon and then with your hands, until well combined; batter will be sticky. Pour into the prepared pan.  Bake in the preheated oven until golden brown on top, 50 to 60 minutes. Coat butter on top, back in oven for 5 mins